The great thing is ...
We no longer have to make a decision at sixteen that will define us for the rest of our life. We can chop and change.
We can make life work on our terms. We can create our own version of success across home, life and ourselves.
The truth is, I have been in all three categories but these days I fly in number three. However it wasn't always that way.
When I began a mum, something unexpected happened. I became suuuper ambitious and everything changed.
Yep that time when have the least amount of time ever.
There has never been a better to create your own version of business and life
As an almost 36 year old women, mother of one I thought (or so the press the told me) I may be in a limited position at this time; less options, less money, less opportunities and recognition.
I am thrilled to say, I haven't found this to be the case.
In fact the opposite, there is a wonderful rise of personal brands and creatives flourishing online and you can do the same.
But you need a plan (that's where I come in)
Taking selfies with the inlfuencers of Instagram is all great and flamingos but you have to bring in the cash too (if it is a business... if it isn't...keeping standing on one leg and working on your 'peace sign').
There are amazing opportunities and events out there which will echo what I am saying. In fact I am a regular speaker and writer on this very topic.
Below is just a selection of recent credits...
You may be relieved to know...
You don't just have to do one thing.
You can be a parent and still be creative.
You can run your own gig and not be constantly stressed.
You can work your week on your terms.
In fact, I only realised this when I became a parent...suddenly a whole new hidden world was revealed.
Life is what you make it as you know, so you can believe the negative rubbish or simply crack on and listen to the nudges that pointing you in the direction of doing things YOUR way.
It's true...I have never been busier but it isn't all 'laptop lifestyle and perfect hair and contouring...'
(and it isn't always easy.... but...I wouldn't have it any other way.
These days I have an expansive, interesting, creative portfolio career;
I'm an actor, life coach, writer, speaker and a mum.
I am all about doing what you love and less of what you don't.
However it wasn't always like this. In fact if you had asked me at 25 what I would be doing in ten years from now, I wouldn't have believed you.
That I would still be with the man I have just started having drunken chats with...
That we would have a beautiful son together (and hope to grow our family in the future)
That we would live together in our ideal part of London and be creatively fulfilled
That I could have an eclectic, creative, thriving career that allows me to be a present parent and nurture my ambition. But also help others to create their own version of success.
Where I am now didn't magically occur. It was strategically planned...
I now help my clients to do the same, not to replicate but find their ideal solution
because like me, I expect:-
You are short on time. Never have you been more stretched in all different directions. 'Me time' may have gone on holiday and er without you...
You are tired... you don't have the headspace for nonsense. You want the quickest, fastest, most straight forward plan to get from A-B
You want to spend time with your kids or those you love... you don't want to see them just occasionally and even then not be fully present and engaged.
You want to stop feeling overwhelmed. Overwhelm can quickly slip into anxiety...you know when you are in this state you are not giving your best in any area of your life and that doesn't sit well with you...
You want to bring in consistent income. Life costs FACT and doing a passion project and spending a lot of time arsing about is not an option. You need to bring in more than a cup of coffee and a bus fare for a morning's work...
You don't necessarily want to high five strangers in Bali on a 'find your life's purpose' retreat. Sure, a week's worth of uninterrupted sleep would be worth the airfare money in itself but your commitments may not allow you to pop on a plane. You need the plan and need to get moving.
Here are some of the topics my clients want to talk to me about:
The Vision (and making it happen) | Money | The People i.e. the customer
Actually figuring out what you want; what is important and what you value. What your short term and long term goals are so you can build action plans that are aligned. This is intense work that needs a certain mindset. Not one that is accompanied by the soundtrack of Cbeebies and a toddler who is 'operating' the washing machine like a typical morning for me. Working hard, rushing around, constantly playing catch up can feel relentless. But once you know the big picture, the trickiness along the way is all worth it.
Some key topics I love:
Dreaming big | Mapping out what you want for your business and life | Making life and career work on your terms.
How to make it and make more. Many of my clients want to transfer their current skills into a passion project that can be monetised. However talking about money can be an emotional topic; what am I worth? Will people pay? I am not good at selling... Money can be a real stumbling block... I am going to help you figure out your offerings and services and make sure you are selling stuff you like doing and you are offering it in a way that you like to work.
Some key topics I love:
How to bring in consistent income | How to create multiple income streams | How to create different offerings at varying price points | How to remain creative and in credit :)
Tell me all about it
Being unique and 'YOU' online is essential but how much do you share? Not everyone wants to be a vlogger who films themself waking up in the morning and turning off the 6:30am alarm. (Oh and let's face it, you may not need an alarm as you may have one or more kidlets raiding your bed!)
Some key topics I love:
How to share what you have to offer without being salesy | How to format your 'about page' on your website even though you don't know where to start | Figure what you need to include on your website to take you to the next level | How to step into your USP (even though it feels scary)
Know, like and trust | Self Care | Behind the scenes
Know like and Trust
The power of video; how you can use it in a way that suits you and allows us to get to know you better. How to create your ideal branding headshots. Both areas come naturally to me as I have been an actor for over 25 years- don't worry there are some very simple tips that are going to change everything.
Some topics I love:
Testimonials: how to gain them and make them work for you | Work on your elevator pitch 'So what do you do then?' can bring most out in a hot sweat... However a few simple considerations will make this a whole lot easier | How to approach potential collaborators and how to win at networking. How to create a strategy for success so you stand out in the market place.
All about you
It all starts with you. If you are not on top form, no one wins. I share practical exercises to help you figure out where you are now; emotionally, physically, mentally, financially and then help you get to where you want to be in the above areas.
Discover habits, thoughts, patterns of behaviour that may be distracting, holding you back, procrastinating and keeping you playing small.Uncover any limiting beliefs which are a reflection of the 'old you' and are annoyingly getting in the way. You will also create your non negotiations i.e the stuff you need to make life better for you and then scheduling them on a regular basis, create delegation strategies so you get the help you need.
Finally uplevel your surroundings, your mindset, your daily life to create the success you deserve and quickly switch gears from parent to business owner.
Some topics I love:
Creating a life and a business that is satisfying but not overwhelming. Looking at building confidence and challenging limiting beliefs and old stories that are holding you back.
Behind the scenes
Stress free life is the best. Obviously we are not going for perfection buuuttt there will be invaluable tweaks you can make, including: Boundaries...get great boundaries and your whole business and life will change. I promise... just you wait and see...Systems. I will show you how to create systems in your business so things will run smoothly and effectively. Templates will be your best friend...I will show you how. Identify triggers which slow things down; these could be thoughts, activities, actions or people
A spring clean of your business and life. You will take a good look around and reflect on what is working and where changes are necessary.
The whole life coach thing...
Yes. I am a life coach. I sometimes can't believe it either.
The clues were there from an early age; a love of self development, a passion for helping and supporting others, finding a solution to get s&^t done... this was much needed as I am from a small town in Lincolnshire which can be limited in opportunities (as in stuff that lit me up) so I had to think and dream big.
However I didn't look like a life coach and still don't (I probably won't high five you, I don't have perfect hair all the time and I don't work from a sun lounger overlooking the Indian Ocean).
Oh and I definitely don't wear a patronising pashima and give you ALL the eyes 'Now let's make you feel all judged and confirm you have no idea what you are doing with your life'. No no no...
The truth is when I first looked into life coaching, the irony was I had no idea what I was doing with my life.
I was a jobbing actor with no regular acting jobs, I was juggling oodles of temp jobs to just about get by, I hate where I lived, I lost 3 of my grandparents in quick succession. If I am honest, most of the time I wanted to watch continuous box sets and hide under my duvet. These days I realise this struggle has given me huge empathy and a big, big heart.
Alongside this, I am fiercely ambitious and incredibly motivated. I work really hard and also do what I say I am going to do. I wasn't very good at 'waiting for the phone to ring' to give me permission to start living my 'dream life'.
I knew I had to figure it out. I knew what I wanted to create when I became a parent:
A way to combine my passions; to spend most of my time doing stuff that made me feel good
A flexible working situation where I could work for myself. Where I could choose and create my own hours. Where I could be open to possibility and opportunity.
Where I could actually enjoy my life and earn great money to do whatever I wanted. I was bored of struggling and playing small doing stuff that wasn't meant for me. I am a big geek and rebel in equal measure...I love learning but I like to add my own twist on it.
I wanted to be a mother and be present. To not just spend my life stressed, busy and wiping (definitely didn't anticipate the amount of wiping) but to actually enjoy family life; to go on adventures and create buckets of joy in my life (the miserable, box set version of me isn't particularly entertaining...but I often have a fantastic array of comfort food!)
Fast forward ten years on, I am thrilled to say this is my reality. This is not to be smug or annoying and there is a big old disclaimer coming right now... my life is not perfect all the time.
But on the whole, I am pretty content.
I have options. I have choice. I have invested £1000s into my own development over the years...because these strategies work.
Why? Do i REALLY NEED A LIFE COACH? wHAT CHANGES CAN i EXPECT?
You stop being a wishy washy person who only talks about your dreams. Instead you make them happen. You stop just hoping that someday you maaay get a chance to do what you want and you take the first steps.
You build a plan.. a practical solution to take you from where you are to where you want to get to... you know, actionable baby steps.
It works for most people. Despite being all Northern and a bit skeptical, this stuff worked for me. I was back on track. I was suddenly back in control and on my way to carving this wonderful portfolio career I have now.
Change can be difficult. It can be easier to stay the same. We need strategies to make everything easy.
You gain clarity... identifying what you want. You stop going round in circles and not knowing where to start? When we work together, I will help you get specific so everything is aligned and you work smartly not necessarily hard.
Coaching requires focus and commitment- therefore you are likely to get quicker results as you work alongside a coach.
You generate options- perhaps solutions/possibilities/opportunities that you haven't yet considered.
You can challenge your limiting beliefs. Often my clients build confidence and let go off negative mind chatter that doesn't serve them. Unlock what is holding you back so you can move forward promptly.
No more of that 'foggy head' feeling, you will have an exact process to follow as I help you break down things that are currently feeling 'huge' 'overwhelming' or 'confusing'.
You become accountable. We all can slip into 'Oh, I'll do it tomorrow/next week/when I feel ready' and then procrastination takes over so ideas are shelved. As your coach, I am invested in your results and provide measures and motivation to keep you on track.
By investing in yourself, you raise the stakes and are likely to gain quicker and greater results. By moving away from 'maybe one day, I will do x, y and z' to creating an action plan with a coach you accelerate the progress.
So what next and what do you need to know?
I am a Personal Performance Coach certified by the Coaching Academy. I have coached over 600 people at the point of writing.
I am only interested in your wants/needs. I don't share a tried and tested methods and definitely don't do video trainings on how to build a sales funnel. I am an expert coach but not an expert of your life and I am never going dictate what you should do for the best.
Surely I can figure this out myself?! Yes you could, but it will probably take longer. You could even speak to a mate over a bottle of wine. But change can be a tricky chap... that's why I am trained to help.
The choice is yours. You can choose how you work with me depending on your required support. You can buy a bundle of 1, 3, 6 or 12 sessions. 3 sessions can be used within 6 months and 6 and 12 sessions can be used within 12 months.
How does it work? Sessions take place over Skype/Facetime or in person in London...depending on your preference. Each session is an hour.
Before each session: You will received personalise pre work; this is for you to complete before the session and return. This is so you can get clear on what you need so during our session we build effective solutions. Your results are key to this so the more I know what you need help with the better. Exercises will be sent between sessions too.
After each session: You will receive a full write up of our sessions; all the ideas you mentioned and the topics we discussed. Most importantly the action plan you devised. This write up is a great reference to keep you on track and also a beautiful record of how far you've come. During our sessions I will be capturing your ideas and scribbling away so you don't have the pressure of writing everything down. My clients love this follow up; it is a refreshing reminder of the progress made, plus it details everything we discussed so none of your ideas were lost.
Between sessions: Often my clients have enormous break throughs 'Yesss, maybe I can do this'. You may not be ready to share your ideas with the world yet but you are welcome to share them with me. Also get feedback or another part of eyes; for example if you are a freelancer and reworking your packages to bring in more money you may want to share the top secret sales page with me before you press publish.
Email support details: 1 session include 1 month, 3 and 6 sessions have 6 months email support and 12 sessions gives you virtual cheerleading for a whole year. Between sessions can welcome doubt, uncertainty and insecurity, especially if you are making bold moves in your life. Not anymore. I will be by your side, supporting you all the way.
One Session >>> £149
Three Sessions >>> £430
Six Sessions >>> £800
Twelve Sessions >>> £1500
Or I have a six module self study course covering:
Your vision | Money- how do I pay you? | Tell me all about it | Know/like/trust | All about you | Behind the scenes
Or maybe you would like to create passive income streams that will not only accelerate your business but also add enormous value to your customers:
So what happens if we do nothing?
We don't know where to start so become completely overwhelmed...so we don't do anything (cue slope back to the duvet and putting the box set on!)
We let fear guide us- What will people think? What if it all goes wrong? What if I get found out? All the voices get in your way. Often they are simply stories and I will give you tools to deal with these pesky little gremlins.
We get in our own way. We tell ourselves we can't do it. We tell ourselves the 'good stuff happens' to other people. THIS IS NOT TRUE. You can do it too. You just have to get clear on what you want, I will help you build the plan to make it happen.
We don't believe it is possible. We think the task is too big so we become stifled and stay where we are. I help you break it down, baby. One step at a time.
We tell ourselves we don't have enough time/money/energy/confidence etc to make it happen. I help you think creatively; to find a way, to look at alternatives (obviously without selling a kidney!)
EXPECTED RESULTS FROM WORKING WITH ME?
More money. More time. More clients. More exposure. More connections. More leverage.
More time with you family. More adventures. More success on your terms.
Yep, it's scary...
But sometimes you just have to decide.
To say now is the right time; even if you don't know HOW you are going to make it happen.
A little more about me and a few scary shares...
Here are a few things I have done in the last few years (all of which were scary!) :
1) Left a job I could have easier stayed at- it was comfortable; I liked it, I was good at it. But it didn't fulfil my creative ambition.
2) I had a baby- all 9 pound 10 ozs. A 3 day labour, emergency C section. I will spare you the full details. But I am so lucky to be his mama, I adore him (obviously got a little choked up writing this).
3) I changed management. Again, lovely people. I could have stayed. But I knew I need to push myself to make some bold moves
4) I turned down the opportunity to cast for a job that would pay me £12,000 for 2 days work. A huge amount of money but it didn't align with me and sit with integrity- I need to play the long game. Plus my partner was offered the audition too. £24,000 for us as a family. Still no.
5) I spent £600 on yoga classes. Yep. A huge investment again but if I don't have my core strength or mental agility I am pretty hopeless to anyone. I was the worst in the class but I needed to rebuild my body after a heavy baby, a knackered back and 13 months of breastfeeding. Sometimes you have to go all in (and not look in the mirror the first few times). Bizarrely after committing to regular classes I can now do some poses I couldn't do before I was pregnant. Obviously I don't get too smug as I quickly topple over...
6) I have streamlined my services. I have ditched certain elements I no longer want to do, I have increased my prices and only say yes to opportunities that expand me.
7) Rebranded. I spent hundreds of pounds on a photo shoot, a new wardrobe and hair and makeup. My job requires me to be visible. To connect, to speak out and to empower others. I couldn't do that half heartedly. (BTW I didn't feel ready to do the shoot; insecurities about my 'new body' came out to play. I had to ignore or at least tell them to quieten down.)
8) I moved everything I do to www.nickyraby.com I used to have two separate sites; but I realised I was hiding behind a logo. To be the best coach to serve my clients, I need to be me; to show up, to relate, to support and to listen.
Phew...better out than in...
I can help you figure out the next chapter; the change of job, pace, lifestyle aka creating success on your terms.
I am a busy mum (plus actor, coach, speaker, writer) so I work effectively and practically, you don't have to go to Morocco to a silent retreat for fortnight to 'figure it out'
Feel free to ask questions, using the form below: