Feeling rubbish is not an option you have to endure…
‘Put up and shut up’
‘Be seen and not heard’
‘Do what you have always done’
‘You are the type of person who does x,y and z’ ‘We are all in this together…. (or are we?!’)
‘She’s was only joking (aka being mean and a little passive aggressive)’
Making changes in our life often have a ripple effect… it’s like when you start decorating a room or buying something new for your wardrobe suddenly everything you had before doesn’t quite align or maybe doesn’t feel like you anymore.
That is ok.
In fact awareness and permission is everything.
We know when it is time to leave, shift, say no, switch off, ignore, offer an alternative. For me I feel it physically in my body. My appetite changes. I lose sleep. My random headaches appear and I am forced to get into bed.
The awareness kicks in; knowing something isn’t quite right.
But it is permission that keeps us in the old groups, conversations, jobs, locations…
‘Wellll maybe this is it for me…’
‘Life is ok so maybe I should stay’
‘I don’t want to be rude’
‘These don’t exactly feel like my people… but they may think I am weird if I leave the group’
Your permission is granted…
1) Say no
2) Leave the group
3) Create your own
4) Do what you need to do to feel inspired once again
5) Have a tool box of replies that make you feel empowered ‘ I know you probably didn’t mean that comment but making a joke there makes me rubbish…’
6) You can change at anytime
7) Decide on what you need and take the first step
8) Build brilliant boundaries
9) Be kind and fair
10) You only have one life and you can choose how you spend it.